Man, I Can Barely Make My Blog Post Titles Less Than 140 Characters Long

Hi everyone!

Good heavens, more snow cometh!  SNOW GALORE! 

So this is the state of the world now forever?  Not sure I approve. 

I feel like I should be rereading The Long Winter by Laura Ingalls Wilder every week, you know, just to remind myself that at least I don’t have to twist my own hay to burn for heat, and at least I have hot cocoa, and at least I can still (usually) get to the library, and that in general I am extremely relieved to be living in this century instead of that one.

(Instead I am reading another excellent book on writing by Orson Scott Card, called Character and Viewpoint, which so far is kind of awesome.)

Lately I’ve been thinking about Twitter.  Specifically, whether to get sucked in or not.  On the one hand, I understand it’s a terrific way to connect with other people who love books to talk about books (or, perchance, TV), but on the other hand, do I seriously need a 24-7 scrolling chat room of fascinating people in the background while I’m trying to write? 

And also, 140 characters??????  For serious?  Have I ever had a thought I could condense that well?  Have you seen this blog?  Or, if you know me, read any of my emails?  I’m…not so much with the short-windedness.  (<—see, I could have just said “bad at brevity”, couldn’t I?  or “a bit blithery”.  or “somewhat verbose”.  Or “What?  I like words”.  I especially like them in vast quantities, done up in all their finery, and piled in drifts like all that snow outside.)

All right, learning to be briefer would probably be “good for me”, much like asparagus.  And John Scalzi and Nathan Bransford both make compelling cases pro-Twitter.

But then again, I just learned from a friend of mine that some people out there have programmed little bots to roam around Twitter pouncing on people and calling them lame for inoffensive things like saying “New on the blog” in a tweet.  What?  Why be randomly mean to total strangers?  Oh, Internet, this is why you make me sad sometimes.  Does this happen often on Twitter?  What if I unintentionally have terrible Twittiquette and make lots of people mad and then they can all freely tell me about how much they hate me, because that’s how Twitter works?  Terrifying!

However, on the ninth hand, I know some really awesome people who are on the Twitters, and I would love to be able to jump into their conversations in a socially acceptable way.  🙂

AND YET!  Quite possibly I have nothing interesting to say!  Whatsoever!  (Er, other than once a week, at ridiculous length, right here, of course.)  ;-)  I experimented the other day with trying to think of tweets to tweet as I went about my day, and realized they would all be about this guy:

Woo hoo!  Tweet me!

and the vast number of blueberries he can eat in one sitting, and then the incredibly startling color of the repercussions.  Hmmm.  Fascinating?  Tweetable?  Who wants to know about this?  Anyone?  At least I know my mom and Jonah’s great-grandmother like reading this blog for the baby photos (hello!  I love you guys!).  But they’re proooooobably not going to join Twitter just to watch me try mangling my profound observations into 140 characters.  So who would care?  Why would I inflict that on the universe?

Except that if people are out there talking about books, I want to join in.  I need more talking about books (or, say, TV!), particularly because most of my current book conversations go like this:

“What does the red bird see?  A duck!  What does the duck say?”
“Wak wak wak!”
“That’s right!  Quack quack quack!  You’re a genius!  And the duck sees a blue horse!  What does the horse say?”
“Wak wak wak!”
“Er…OK, close.  And the horse sees a green frog!  Yay, a frog!  What does the frog say?”
“Very good effort, honey.”

And so, I would not be averse to some slightly deeper thoughts on, say, how adorable A Sick Day for Amos McGee is, and whether the awesome mouse on every page is intended to be an homage to Good Night, Gorilla.

Therefore, in conclusion…140 characters???????  Must I?

Well, I certainly mustn’t before I finish this manuscript, anyhow.  Enormous flapping deadline!  Swooping around!  Just waiting to get shredded by a giant shiny new time suck!  That might be the entire appeal, actually…a whole new world of procrastination…SO DANGEROUS.  And that is the other question: when would I tweet?  Not while the baby’s awake, unless we want all my tweets to end with “clever observaurfruhjuasfrhrkghuafrhu” (he has a bit of a love affair with buttons).  But when the baby’s asleep, I need to (a) write, (b) sleep, and (c) watch critically important television like Human Target, which I am now catching up on and loving.

SO!  It’s a quandary.  And didn’t you all want to hear about it?  🙂

I’ve got a tweet for you: This stuff is cold!  Back inside to the blueberries, please! 

P.S. This is from a while ago, but it’s my favorite thing I’ve seen all week:  The Alot Is Better Than You At Everything.  YES and YAY.  It will warm the hearts of editors, former editors, grammar/spelling fans, and anyone who loves yak/pug hybrids.  🙂

Quote of the Day:  “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day.  Teach him to use the Net and he won’t bother you for weeks.” — Anonymous